As obviously expected, I went to watch Underworld: Rise of the Lycans and I was definitely not disappointed at all.

My friend had said that the show didn’t give anything more than the previous two to the series. But my argument was that this is the Underworld series – are you watching it for anything else besides the action? I watched it only for the action sequences and because it is about vampires since I have this unhealthy obsession with them. Need there really be more?

I am a little surprised how much Rhonda Mitra looks like Kate Beckinsale. I still do think that Kate Beckinsale makes the better looking vampire. Rhoda’s honey gold skin turned pale looked a bit odd to say the least.

All is well and good as the action sequences did not fail to disappoint and I enjoyed every bit of it. Next vampire movie - Let The Right One In

I wonder if I am really lacking in sleep or that I am just making use of my bed because it is there.

Every weekend is mostly spent in bed, sleeping for the most part, since I never really seem to have plans. So while I can pad around the house, I normally just coop myself my in my room, with nothing much else to do there but sleep.

Even to the extent, I sleep through my meals. It is a wonder I am not skinny because I hardly eat any meals at all during the weekends.

Now I have this horrid migraine that refuses to go away even after I have eaten.

One week passes into another, with no real sense of it being different, a beginning or an end.

It feels like very weekend, I become a catatonic being. Since I have nothing to do, I just spend it cooped up in my room – mostly sleeping the entire weekend away. It definitely does feel like I am just wasting my life away, with no accomplishments, nothing. The zest and the passion I used to have (for life or otherwise) has disappeared. Disappeared till the point that there are no fragments of it left in my life. Just a void there or maybe the void has disappeared also.

Someone mentioned, maybe the solution to this is to have more friends. As with more friends, the likely hood of one of them being free when one asks, or they would be the ones doing the asking would be higher. Over the years, my circle of friends has not grown. In fact, it has shrunk. A few have life the country and other get caught up further in their busy lives while the only thing that seems to occupy my time is work.

I just the solution is to find my passion or something I am passionate about again. That would at least give me something to do.

So I am stealing Ngee Ann City’s program name for my post title.

But its so true to form that is hard to run away from. While I was walking down Orchard road, contemplating where to get a journey from, I hear the music coming from the heart of Ngee Ann City Plaza. I knew I just had to stop to listen.

So I snagged myself a stair and sat down to enjoy the St Pat’s military band – the Junior band apparently and they aren’t half bad. It was nice to hear them play both overtures and more pop hits like Can You Feel The Love Tonight and Twist & Shout. Those seem to be band favourites.

Now I am just sitting here waiting for the Senior band to get into formation, tune up their instruments and warm up.

The Senior band’s conductor introduces the next song as “From Michael Buble” GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR! Why does everyone credit Michael Buble only?!?!?!? When so many other people have sung it and he was not the first person to make it popular. Sigh, what is this state of our musical education. Thankfully, the band made up for the anguish that the conductor had caused. They were pretty good. I felt like getting up and dancing but unfortunately there was no one to dance with me.

As a finale piece, the band put together a melody of ABBA songs tho the person who introduced it went: songs from Mamma Mia and also the album ABBA Gold. I wonder if the kid knows that the songs form ABBA were used to write the play and not the other way around. But their melody was absolutely amazing.

Maybe I should really learn how to dance and maybe start going out with people so that I can dance when the music inspires. I’m so glad I had stopped to enjoy the music.

The fifteen days of the celebratory period of the Lunar New Year is over.

There is some sense of disappointment suddenly. Maybe it is because my family will probably forget me again since there is no requirement to call me anymore. Maybe it’s just odd for it to be over.

It is just depressing for it to be over so fast.

The last few days have been extremely difficult at work.

Because I was weak, now I am left to be vulnerable. Sometimes I play back the scene were I lost my self-control in my head and it just seems like it could not have had happened. It feels like a dream, so surreal on the edges of my mind.

I feel uncomfortable and no longer safe in the haven of my work. I am unsure where this path will take me. The flight response is now very strong within me and it worries me. I am spiraling and I do not know how to stop this.

I feel lost and alone and scared on what I might do next. Why was I so weak to begin with?