For the most part of my life, I have been a loner. I grew up depending on myself, fending for myself. Yes, there are friends that give me a crutch if I require it, but as some of them say, I am the most independent person they know (maybe their friend circles are a little bit smaller than one would hope, but I digress).

Recently it has hit me like a ton of bricks that I have in some ways become very dependant on someone close to me. And the only reason that dawning of light has occurred is because by some strange way, I feel I have lost that person.

Then when it finally came to pass, there was a terrible sense of loss, a missing part of me that I do not know if I will find again. This strange rush of emotions took me by surprise and I reeled from it when the reality of my changed life hit me.

It feels so strange to be dependant on this person. A person who swept into my life like a gust of wind and turned it upside down (In a good way of course). I doubt anyone can fill that person’s shoes but yet, there is a strange longing inside of me that wishes the void can be filled.